Just hanging out listening to and enjoying some Justin Ashton then Essence when I noticed a Christian2011's profile.
I have to say I've seen a lot of empty profiles lately, or some that say things like, ...If you want to know, just ask. I rarely mess with those as there is nothing to catch my interest. The theory behind them is that people will need to ask/talk to learn about a person vs seeing some corny quotes by someone else or worse yet the whole gamut including things like,....If you mess with my boo, I F you up, etc. To each their own, but I don't mind interesting quotes, as even those tell a bit about a person in what they like and chose to quote and it does give a person something to talk about. However tonight I found Christan's profile to be loaded with gems about SL. It's funny stuff I thought I'd save them here. I hope you get a kick out of it as much as I did. Kudos to Christian for a fun profile read! After all my time in SL, I find these to be pretty spot on. Enjoy
""Ten Reasons You Might Be A Noob":
10. ...aren't wearing anything worth more than $1L.
9. ...have less than 2000 inventory items and yet can't seem to find the thing you need.
8. ...have filled up your picks page with nothing but ads for free sex dungeons and/or ways to earn free lindens.
7. ...frequently "wear" boxes then detach and delete them from your inventory, assuming that it is a malfunctioning item.
6. ...have never uttered the word "blingtard."
5. ...have less than $1000L on you and do more of your shopping at freebie places than at actual stores.
4. ...aren't sure what an AO is and are blissfully happy waddling around like an oompa loompa.
3. ...walk physically over to the contest board in order to see who you're voting for at events.
2. ...spend 100% of your time in public places. And at least 50% of that time is spent naked.
1. ...are not sure who Ruth is but are looking forward to meeting her.
Next we have ... "SL Facts and Myths": Christian got these from someone named Tiana:
1)Ppl with anything related to drama in their profile are usually at the center of it...normal ppl don't have enough drama in their life to make note of the dislike
2)PPL WHO HAVE ALL CAPS AND NOTHING BUT CAPS IN THEIR PROFILE usually have an ego bigger than their mental stability and an over whelming need to be heard
3)Naked guys will always bump into you ..here is a tip guys..no matter how many times you bump her she will not bend over
4)If your avatar is preggers nobody else really wants to hear your tummy talk...You see it as romantic... we see it as spam
5)If someone invites you to see their parcel they are not inviting you to take a landmark for future use of their sex bed
6)If a guy is dancing with someone that is not the signal to all the ladies in the room he is available... Lets all try to observe the girl code
7)If someone is looking at your avatar be flattered it means all the money was well spent
8) Saying "nice ass" to a woman you have never talked to before... is NOT the way to get positive attention
9)Facelights are a thing of the past.. please retire yours. (Note from Kara. I'm good with the new Catwa light facelights. It's been proven they dont project and do enhance a look)
10)If you see ppl with missing body parts you need to upgrade to a mesh viewer not message them and ask them to wear prims...change is good..embrace it
11)Messaging someone and saying "Hi how old are you?" Is rude no matter what country you are from
12)Some ppl can't even get laid in a sex sim
13)Nobody cares about spelling and punctuation..comedic timing is so much more important. Grammar police suck!
14)Don't add random ppl you have never spoken to..it is called FRIENDS list not a FAUX FRIENDS list
15)Blinging shoes mean one of two things..escort or a man (sometimes both)
16) Just because a woman asks you a question..this does not mean she wants your pixel penis
17) Just Here for FUN...usually means just here to get LAID.
Then there are the "OWLisms" Christian got these from Owl Janus with permission. (I didn't get permission but Owl doesn't have these in the profile and I couldn't get ahold of Owl, so if he later says get the off the blog and I can't sweet talk him into letting me quote the Owl, . .. these will be history)
You can spend as much money as you like on your avi, but inner ugliness always shines through.
If you want to talk down to someone, firstly make sure that they're not more intelligent than you.
Before you open your mouth to speak, ask yourself three things... is it true, it it necessary, is it kind?
With reference to the above, sometimes add a forth thing... 'do I fucking care?'↑
↑
The above quotes are my originals, so if you see them in someone else's Picks, they've been copied.
Again stole from Bod.Janus with permission"
And finally we have the "7 Things A Man Might Tell You About His Ex":
She Cheated= He Cheated
Be nice to her it will drive her Mad= Im still talking to her and dont want you to know
She is the biggest whore= She dumped me
We are just friends= I fuck her when you log
I love you= I love you till you log off then I love her
Sorry real got busy=I'm on an alt fucking your sister
I have to log= The other girl I am fucking just logged on.
I am a DOM= I wore that cock ring like a lil bitch
STOLEN FROM KISSES KARU AND USED BY PERMISSION.
Anyway, so go ahead, perv some profiles, you might get a laugh, learn something, or make a new friend. I got all three tonight. I'm actually pretty bad about NOT reading profiles much. I've chatted with a unbeknownst to me high profile av in SL for over an hour before putting my foot in my mouth, which would have been avoided had I read the profile at some point during that hour. He was a good sport about me not recognizing him though : ) Anyway, I think I need to update my own profile. I'd enjoy seeing more creative profiles around. I might just be perving yours next. Happy Monday.
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