Role Play Prejudice Much?

Someone raised a provocative topic over on Facebook today.    I found it good timing as I've been running around the Fantasy Faire a lot lately and ironically had just posted a pic using my av Kara, together with my MAlt (male alt) MitchL.  Both are in fantasy attire in the Fantasy Fair sims.  While I was not actually role playing with them for the most part, they were running around the sims together checking things out and taking pics. 

The Facebook post started with someone indicating they've been chastised for role playing alternative types of avatars.  I couldn't help but respond with a long opinion as I love to enjoy a wide variety of things in SL myself. Along the same lines (sort of) I've been wanting to again blog about all the "good" things about SL besides just sex and griefing that seems to get a ton of media attention because the Relay for Life fundraising is absolutely phenomenal in SL. Plus there is a lot of RL education, music, art, social connection for those with disabilities, etc opportunities going on, but I digress. 

I'd post the direct link to the Facebook thread but can't seem to get the FB Surl to the exact spot.   It's actually in the Second Life group though today so you might find it and all the many comments here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/155844374435030/1015791945106931/?notif_t=group_comment_reply

Anyway.. back to the post.. it starts with the origination of the post by Nick Morgan saying:

Nick:  "To all the people giving me a hard time I am getting tired of it
I am adult I can't rp a kid I am accused or being a pedophile I assure I am not
I am male and I can't rp female I get accused of being gay I am not
I am white and I can't rp black I get accused of being racist I am not
can't roleplay an animal I get accused or being weird
what do you roleplay yourself where's the fun in that I thought second life was about pretending
get an imagination" (sic)

Most of the many responses encouraged the author to play who and how he (he's identified himself as a RL male so I'll go with that) wants to play and not let others dictate how he plays.  There were a few jokes about furrys etc, but for the most part the responses were positive. I've always believed the SL population in general is pretty accepting really.  I've for the most part only seen real prejudices against child avs and a little about some abusive type behaviors rather than "lifestyles" in general.  I have however heard jokes cracked about a variety of alternative looks or behaviors such as overly wide derrieres, some of the animal avatar behavior including milking/cows, etc, animal sex, etc. But for the most part from what I've seen anyway some people might look twice but generally go on about their own merry way leaving people to play who and how they want recognizing this is SL and not first life.  Some things are actually against TOS and might be considered illegal as well especially if an avatar is in SL underage.  I am also aware there has been age play so that ruins it for those who just like to play with a childlike heart and body.  I lived in a wonderful huge family community in SL for a while and I have to say the many many families there were wonderful people and the children were very cute and added a great deal to the community in a variety of ways. Again I digress... so anyway .. back to my response.. here it is:

me: "Pfft.. I play all that and more, and I'm all adult female in RL. For the most part I don't care what anyone thinks about my SL.. my SL is about fun. But I stay primarily a female woman in SL and when I am anything other than adult female I don't have sex, I don't misbehave towards others, I don't lead people on, or misrepresent who I really am to friends etc. I have had no problems whatsoever with my friends or strangers in SL when I am having my alternate fun. I identify only with my female av and the others are like dolls, for fun, etc and they are very fun to dress up, style, take pics of, and yes, get a little goofy role playing differently. That's part of the beauty of SL, we can be what we want and all the uniqueness makes it more interesting. I doubt anyone looks like their av RL. But I'm always upfront to my friends that the alternate is me so there is no confusion. This is because we form real friendships and connections in SL and a small bit of that is trust the person you are close to is who they say they are. I do get that some people think some alternative types of avs are odd because they can be misused in SL. That's just my opinion though. As Izzy said another idea that works for some is not to tell anyone. I used to feel like if someone does get close to me and has an appearance that is vastly different or even misrepresents their RL, then I simply do NOT want to find out later and I don't want my friends or others to know either as I will feel deceived and played. Some people RP but really "play" like real life while others are in constant RP so don't "get" how this might feel bad or like a person is being deceived. We would like others to play how we do but of course everyone plays their own way. If I am not close to someone I don't care but if I am close, even if they don't look or act remotely close to what they would in RL, to an extent I'd still like to be aware of that if I have formed a real bond. It doesn't mean I would give them a hard time though. Plus there are rules about age play, just saying, so with that I get why ppl would be upset. I think it depends what people are doing with their alternative forms. This would make a good blog topic."

And so now I'm blogging it. 

The next post down Tess Stanley-Hannah/Ivey Deschanel in SL (yes I got her permission to quote her) said: "I have 2 words for that and excuse the french but FUCK them. SL is one place where you can experience your dreams and fantasies without being judged. Most of the people I know, some of them now SL "big wigs" spent their first years of SL on a pole or RPing everything under the sun from furries to demons to kids to multi appendaged stocking fetish,horse milkers. I guarantee you everyone who has something negative to say has a LOT of closet skeletons themselves and simply find bigoted pleasure in being the SL morality police. Find like minds who understand and care about you and mute or block the rest. THEY DON'T MATTER -hugs-"     

 I think that sums things up nicely!

There are a whole lot of things to consider in this including how people "play" vs "roleplay" etc.  Of course many people insist on voicing at least once to get a sense of the person they are engaging with, so that says a lot of people DO care to an extent who they are playing with.

Others posts on the thread say things like: It's your SL, live it to the fullest, don't be bothered with haters, have fun, enjoy, be who you want, etc.    Personally I wish I had thought through a better post but in review I guess what I said for the most part covers my opinion on the subject.  Obviously this is a subject many are passionate about based on the large number of responses.  One person even said they role play as a human, but not saying what they are in real life.  hahah.. I'll end on that note and with my picture of me and MitchL my alt. : )

My Alternate Identity Crisis

Dear Diary,
Here I am again as confused as ever in SL. I fear I am having an alt identity crisis, or maybe I am just being SL moody and obsessing again. Over time I have had friends talk to me on alts pretending to be someone completely different than themselves and not identify themselves to me as the av I know as my friend. This has caused me some frustration, a great deal of mistrust and disappointment, as well as embarrassment. I realize SL is "just a game" to some when convenient for them, but there are real feelings involved. Of course I have alts, as previously blogged, for movies, pictures, sometimes just to get some peace and quiet or do/wear/play something different and some people use them for store and club fillers, models, helping to build, etc. So there are many good reasons to have an alt, but I never mislead someone on mine. I mean.. with my guy I am quick to tell anyone that it's me and not a real guy and why I am on him, etc. I know people have other reasons for pretending to be someone completely different on an alt, but I can't think of one that seems ok and seems likely its for spying or hiding something. I have to say I have felt very "played" when not told upfront about alts. I wish all my friends would just tell me who their alts are and leave it at that. My alts are like a money pit actually, because no matter how many nice freebies I can find, I still want to buy them cool stuff too.

Note to self: Some possible signs of an alt:
-Have a very recent profile date, yet look very well put together with great skin, hair, clothes, AO, profile picks, etc. and knowledgable about all things SL.
-No payment info. on file yet still have many of the things listed above.
-Similar look/mannerisms/clothes, groups, etc. as someone else known.

Dear Diary, I really am pro alt, I just don't want to get played by them by people I think are friends. They confuse me too much. So what do you think Dear Diary, should I just go make a new alt to fool all my friends, mess with their minds, do dirty deeds? I have to wonder what the limit by LL is on the number of alts one person can have? Can I make an army of alts and take over the grid? Nah.. that wouldn't be nice and I doubt my computer could handle that. But... maybe one more just to dress up cool and play with?
Anyway, singing off, Kara.